Is it ok to dislike your mother in law? Do you have this doubt?
Hating anyone is easy, especially on a MIL, it comes easily. But problems that underlie such a stance talks a different story altogether. Come, let’s discuss.
Is It Ok To Dislike Your Mother In Law – A Comprehensive Guide I Have Come Up With For Every DIL Out There!
Dealing day to day affairs with your MIL could be daunting, but should that leave a wrong impression on you of your MIL,it is going to be mind-eating for sure.
Yes, I know for the restlessness and sensitivity that exists around these days, anything your MIL does could piss you off easily. But wait, don’t declare that your MIL is the culprit. Don’t make her your harrowing figure yet.
Loathing your MIL could be easy but the repercussions that come with it could be lasting for your life. This is why you need to understand the issue in depth before you choose to decide – If you could hate your mother-in-law or not.
Shall we discuss?
Your MIL Is Your Husband’s Mother, The One Responsible For Giving You The Best Partner In Life!
Have you ever been on cloud-nine for getting the best partner in your life?
Maybe the way he takes care of you, and displays affection, does it touch your heart all the time?
If yes, don’t you think his behavior should be attributed to his mother and her upbringing?
Yes, men tend to be influenced more by their mothers, so if your husband is a gem of a person you have ever found, forget your MIL’s attitude towards you. She is your best husband’s mother, and that’s all that should matter!
When You Are Living Under The Same Roof With Your MIL, Could You Keep Showing Your Face To Her?
Joint families are facing the test of time for the kind of friction that is generated between the family members on a daily basis. So yes, it is quite challenging to put up with relatives under one roof.
You Are Going To Eat Together With Your MIL If Not For Every Meal, At Least A Few, Isn’t It?
Dining with a MIL whom you don’t like could prove to be bitterful both on your plate and mind.
For once, you could ignore it but when it’s happening over and over, how do you manage?
As a human being, as a member of the family, you have every right to eat at peace -So why even develop crazy hatred towards your MIL by spoiling your equanimity?
How Would You Share Chores With Your MIL, When You Are Averse Towards Her?
In a joint set-up, you cannot let only one person handle all the home chores. It has to be distributive under any circumstances.
This means sharing work with your MIL is not an option for you.
It is mandatory.
Maybe you both could take shifts to avoid one another’s presence in the cooking area, but how would that be even possible? Chances are that you will encounter one another more often, so there is no way you could show your rude face to her all the time.
That said, is it ok to dislike your mother in law?
Moreover, understand that you don’t have the right to hurt anyone, even if it means a MIL who is rude and unfair.
You Are Supposed To Plan Family Expenses With Your MIL. Together, With Resentment, Is That Even Possible?
Be it preparing the monthly list of provisions or vegetables, you will have to give your inputs as a family member, isn’t it?
You cannot be in the same house with your mil and shop separately. Because it would not look nice and in fact it is not be budget-friendly too.
So right from planning the grocery requirements for the month to finalizing the finance, it would only be better to do it together as a family.
In that case, how could you do it with utter dislike in your mind for your MIL?
Is It Ok To Dislike Your Mother In Law When You Might Have To Make Some Important Family Decisions With Your MIL Like Conducting A Family Function?
Let’s say your sister-in-law’s marriage is around the corner .
How would it be possible to manage the proceedings of the ceremony without you taking part in it?
Does that not mean sitting with your MIL, and other family members for a proper discussion?
It has to be collective and the decision unanimous for peaceful and joyful progression of things , isn’t it?
That said, how could you have open conversations with your MIL regarding planning of the function, related finances, and management when you have umpteen inhibitions about her?
Festivals Are Times For Bonding, So Learn To Celebrate With Your MIL
Diwali or Sankranti, how could festivals not be inclusive?
Are they not about coming together of souls to celebrate together?
With resentment for your MIL, how could that be even possible?
You Will Start Framing Your MIL For Anything Bad That Happens In Your Marriage, If You Decide To Disrelish Her!
They say marriages are made in heaven but indeed they are handled on earth. So, differences are inevitable.
That said, if you decide to make your MIL accountable for every issue arising in your marriage, how would that work?
Moreover, wouldn’t that piss off your husband too? Which son would stand his wife condemning his mother unreasonably all the time?
Doesn’t that mean you are in a way posing a threat to your relationship’s well-being too?
How Could You Let Your Thoughts About Your MIL Affect Your Children?
Is it ok to dislike your mother in law?
Always remember, the relationship that your children share with your MIL is quite special and noteworthy.
Yes, grannies could always be children’s favorite; that being said, could you affect the equation of their bond by controlling your children?
Don’t you know children could be easily influenced? And does that not mean your unnecessary intervention could leave an indelible negative image on them about their grandmother?
So all that you need to remind yourself is that, Your children are their grandchildren too, so letting your mental discord affect the relationship your children share with your MIL/their grandmother is absolutely unfair and ridiculous!
Whether it is the grandparents’ mistake or their DILS’, it is the grandchildren who suffer from grandparenting-deprivation and also, grandparents who suffer immense depression of being distanced from their grandchildren. Sad, isn’t it?
And What Of Your Husband, Isn’t He His Mother’s Darling Too?
Your MIL has raised your partner to a good human being ; ideally you should be thanking her for that.
In fact, you cannot snatch away the connection a son shares with his mother. But as a partner you have every right to share your woes with him.
So always ensure that you don’t let your opinions/judgements of her affect your partner.
Being Non-Judgemental About Your MIL Is Good For You And Your Sanity
For reasons unknown, Mental health still remains an overlooked concept. Thanks to covid and its repercussions, we have been seeing a good number of awareness campaigns and blogs on it lately.
Like how consuming junk food affects your physical health, framing unnecessary thoughts about your MIL could impact your sanity extensively too, are you even aware of that?
So better stay mindful the next time you are trying to hate your MIL!
If You Are Someone Aiming For A Healthy Family, You Cannot Hate Your MIL!
Do you know the FIVE traits of a healthy Family – In case you have not read my blog on that, please check it out here. You will find a lot of insightful stuff!
Always have in mind, Healthy family is not a natural one, rather it is created with the involvement of family members.
So as a DIL, if you genuinely want to build a healthy family but are trying to bad paint your MIL all the time, you will be only left with ill-will and joyless family life, is that even desirable?
Facing Differences With Your MIL Is A Part Of Life, Don’t Take Them To Your Heart –
No matter what, facing conflict of interests with your MIL is quite common especially when you are living together.
I am not saying you should keep compromising everything for your MIL, but things that are insignificant could be neglected , isn’t it?
All that you need to remember is that, have conviction and stay true to your heart. Because you cannot /should never impress anyone in life – It will only affect your well-being in the long run.
Dear DIL, With A Clean Heart And Mind, You Could Battle Every Odd That Comes Across!
At the end of the day, understand that your MIL is a human being too. She might have her own problems and weaknesses.
The more you zoom in on them, the more it will affect your mental peace. So better chuck off things that bother you about your MIL and keep yourself composed. Also, you could try Meditation, yoga that would help you cross all such hurdles wisely.
When you start building love for your family, its well-being is guaranteed and your perspective towards your MIL would also be positively impacted. So please don’t dislike your MIL, it is good neither for you nor your family!
Here’s wishing you a peaceful life ahead.
If you have any thoughts on this blog, please feel free to reach out to me in the comments section below.
And if you think this blog could benefit other daughters-in-law out there, share them in your circles. Let’s create a happy life for all daughters-in-law out there.